Sometimes, it’s nice to have a little mystery in your life. And by mystery, we mean “safe for work” boobs – that fantastic category of mostly naked, but not quite, that we all love so much. Yes, nudity is great and nipples are amazing, but without a little cover-up sometimes, both seem a little less special. And because of that, we’ve compiled this Comprehensive Guide to SFW Boobs. Here, you’ll find everything from kick ass cleavage shots to super sexy side boobs to some sh*t you’ve never even heard of.
The Bikini
Like the women who wear them, the bikini comes in all shapes and sizes, from full cover-ups to barely there. Here, we’ve put together a complete guide to these lovely little numbers that will have you wishing you were at the beach faster than you can tweet what you’re eating for lunch. Now all you have to do is decide which type of bikini you like best.
Hand Bras
Ah, yes–the wonderful, magnificent “hand-bra”. There’s just something about a woman holding her own breasts that sends a magical lightning bolt of lust through any man worth his weight in Jergens. Maybe it’s that we want to put our hands there, or maybe it’s how freakin’ hot she looks doin’ it. So get ready because if you’re already a breast-man, this could possibly be the greatest thing you’ve ever seen in you’re entire life. And if you’re not a breast-man, you’re about to become one.
The Side boob
The Under boob
Some things in this world are indisputable, like gravity, death and the incredible, inexhaustible awesomeness of boobs. Because of this, we aren’t ashamed of our unending love of this fantastic female feature. So we proudly present to you the one of the sexiest collections in our unending quest for hot ass pictures of chicks wearing nearly nothing – the quintessential Tribute to the Glorious Underboob!
Cleavage
Cleavage is the classic SWF boobage. Unlike some of these other styles, cleavage has been around for probably as long as boobs themselves. But throughout the ages of sexiness, cleavage has never lost its complete and total awesomeness. In fact, cleavage is so awesome, it’s sometime better than seeing the whole shabang – and that’s saying something!
The Sidewinder
After having already covered side-boobs, underboobs, hand-bras and cleavage, we were starting to get worried that there weren’t any more boob categories to get our grubby mitts on. How wrong we were… Meet the ’sidewinders,’ a term referring to the sides of the breasts as viewed from the back. That’s right, from the back. It’s awesome. Enjoy!
The Hair Bra
The hair bra, similar to hand bra, is simply when a girl’s hair is covering the boob(s) – simple as that. And when it comes to boobs, there’s no need to complicate things. So, without further adieu, we present to you, “41 Hellaciously-Hot Hair Bra Honeys”
The Sand Bra
As you now obviously know, there are plenty of different “bra” variations that have nothing to do with actual lingerie: hand bras, hair bras and now, the sand bra. Also known as the “sand-kini” by WildAMaginations.com, which specializes in this kind of thing, the sand bra is basically as close to topless as a girl can get without showing any bare nipple. And if you ask us, the closer to topless the better. Don’t you agree?
The Wet T-Shirt
What’s better than a regular T-shirt? Well, a wet T-shirt, of course! For whatever reason, there’s just something about a girl wearing a mildly translucent, soaking wet shirt that makes a man feel good inside. And if we had to guess, that ’something’ is a combination of boobs and the willingness of a woman to get squirted with a hose on stage. God, life is awesome.
The Wifebeater
Women always seem to think that to look hot, they have to either get really dressed-up or completely strip down. And don’t get us wrong, those are both sexy as hell. But most of the time, the simplest outfit in the world can blow a $1000 dress out of the water. And at the top of this list is the ever-lovely wife beater. If you ask us, all any woman ever needs to wear to blow us fellas out the water is one of these bodacious tank tops, a pair of yoga pants and a smile. Anything more is wasted energy.
The Sweater Kitten
When the cool winds of fall begin flowing down from the North, and it’s time to say goodbye to the cleavage-rific tank-top days of summer, we warmly welcome the fulfilling fall days of delectable sweater kittens (also known as sweater puppies). Sure, they might not show the skin allowed during the balmy months, but with the right combination of softness, tightness and puff, you’re guaranteed for some full-frontal goodness.
The Boob Circle
Let us introduce you to one of the many mysteries of the human female – the boob circle. Most often spotted in pictures taken at bars and parties, the boob circle has no known origin. In fact, we have no idea why it exists at all, or how they happen at all. Does one girl just yell, “Hey, let’s stand in a circle, pull our t*ts out and take a picture!”? We have no clue. Oh well, who cares? Boobs!
